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Finding a compatible partner, From Loneliness to Love: Five Steps for Finding a Healthy Relationship by JoAnne Macco, Relationships Self-help Guide

With all the social distancing and lockdown during these uncertain times of a global pandemic, there is no reason for us to give up on finding the love of our life. In her self-help guide, From Loneliness to Love: Five Steps for Finding a Healthy Relationship, memoirist and former mental health therapist JoAnne Macco does not dillydally with meanderings. She presents each recommended step with clear and concise descriptions and exercises for realizing the change we seek in our lives.
Based on her own journey of finding a compatible partner, following her divorce and two rebound damaging relationships, Macco knows well the pitfalls that await us along the way. She believes that the steps she had taken for a successful outcome could also work for others.
Her first step is intuitive: “Clarify Your Heart’s Desire.” Yet, so many of us can stumble in defining exactly what we seek in a relationship. Tips and exercises help the lonely heart to zero in on the list of qualities that really matter, based on each person’s wants and needs.
Step Two, “Request Help from the Divine,” may seem meaningless to those who do not believe that a higher power exists. Macco does not see this as an impediment. Instead, she offers exercises to strengthen our connection with whatever we perceive the Divine to be: Creator, Great Spirit, The Universe, or something else.
The third step, “Love Yourself Well,” can pose a challenge for those of us lacking in self-esteem. Macco also knows how anger and resentment can also block our path to happiness. Her exercises help us to become our better selves and open our heart to the love we seek.
Step Four, “Focus on Friendship,” is essential to the process—difficult but not impossible during these times of social distancing. Macco describes all the ways in which our network of friends serves us in achieving our desired goal. She offers activities to strengthen this support.
Macco’s fifth step, “Imagine the Best,” is a form of positive thinking. As it relates to finding the love of our life, she is not short on specific ways to imagine the best. She is with us all the way.

JoAnne Macco, now retired, has worked for thirty years as a mental health therapist, specialized in addictions and codependency. Growing up in a military family, she lived in six U.S. states and Canada. Her love for nature, art, and writing became the constants in her life. In her first book, Trust the Timing: A Memoir of Finding Love Again, Macco tells the story of how her high school sweetheart found her thirty-nine years later when the timing was perfect. She blogs at “Anything is Possible!” where she writes about relationships, spirituality, and hope. She lives with her husband in North Carolina. Learn more at https://joannaoftheforest.wordpress.com/
those are some good tips and suggestions.
lack of suspicion can be another criteria. empathy might also be helpful
best wishes.
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dear Rosaleine,
I am also pleased to inform that I have nominated you for the Mystery blogger award.
here is the link-
https://justicemirror.com/mystery-blogger-nomination-by-dulcy-singh/
happy blogging.
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Atul, thanks for the nomination, but I will be unable to participate due to my other commitments.
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its all right. not an issue. I just wanted to thank you by the nomination.
best wishes. 🙂
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Your kindness is appreciated 🙂
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Atul, I agree that trust and empathy would be worthy of consideration when preparing one’s list of qualities desired in a partner. Best wishes to you, too 🙂
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the list cannot be exhaustive. people wil add or expect lots of qualities depending on their need and circumstances.
best wishes
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Very important qualities! Thanks, Atul.
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pleasure.
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Thanks for sharing this wonderful work.
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This sounds like a very nurturing book. Thanks, Rosaliene!
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Rebecca, it is, indeed, a nurturing book from a person with a generous heart.
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Wonderful, on the to read list it goes. 🙂
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Thank you, both. It warms my heart to know the nurturing comes through!
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I can’t speak for other countries, but the stability of interpersonal relationships in the U.S. has been declining for decades; and, obviously, the coronavirus pandemic isn’t helping either. There are a multitude of social factors involved which I won’t get into now, but it’s safe to say that the problem is larger than individual people. As Macco suggests, we all can do better. Although, I wish that people who struggle with relationships don’t blame themselves too much. Maintaining healthy relationships isn’t easy. Often times, it just doesn’t work out. Being single isn’t a bad thing, and it shouldn’t be ostracized in any way.
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Thanks for sharing your thoughts, Robert. Maintaining a healthy relationship is, indeed, not easy, all the more why I have a deep respect and admiration for couples like JoAnne Macco and her husband. My best friend and her husband, both now deceased, also enjoyed a healthy relationship. I chose to remain single after my divorce and am happy with my decision.
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Robert, I agree that being single is NOT a bad thing at all. Thank you for making that point. Learning to love myself as a single person was very important and necessary. I accepted that staying single was an option with its own benefits. I hope the steps that helped my partner find me can be adapted to a variety of relationships and choices. Thank you both for sharing your thoughts. Rosaliene, I’m glad you’re happy with being single. I can understand.
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🙂
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I strongly agree with the third suggestion. So important for any kind of relationship building and the most difficult to enact.
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I agree, Pallavi. When we don’t love ourselves, we open ourselves to self-harming, toxic relationships
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That’s what happened to me, Rosaliene. I had to back up and start loving myself again, to include myself in my circle of compassion.
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Loving myself again took many years.
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We are worth it!
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Self love is an ongoing process, especially balancing self love with caring for others.
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Cyril, thanks for sharing my post with your readers. Much appreciated 🙂
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What a very useful sounding book, including for those of us looking to strengthen friendships, as well as those hoping for romance.
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I agree, Cath. Macco’s guide goes beyond finding one’s soulmate.
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I’m so glad you picked up on these broader applications beyond romantic love. We need healthy relationships with friends and with self.
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Regardless of relationship status, these are wise steps.
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I thought so, too, Crystal.
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Thank you, Crystal!
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No, thank you, JoAnna!
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Interesting to see US culture is still so focused on “love” and romantic relationships. Outside the US, feminist literature emphasizing strong female friendships is experiencing a strong revival. Feminist City by Canadian author Leslie Kern and Invisible Women by British author Caroline Criado Perez are good examples.
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Interesting, Dr. Bramhall. I’ll have to check out the books you’ve mentioned.
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I appreciate your perspective. Dr. Bramhall. It is true that US culture tends to focus on romantic love. In my memoir, Trust the Timing, I wrote about the value of relationships with women and how strong female friendships helped heal my damaged self-esteem and gave me direction during crucial times. I hope I can continue to do the same for others.
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Rosaliene, thank you very much for sharing about my book. You did an excellent job of summarizing. I greatly appreciate your kind words and that you found this book clear and concise yet also supportive.
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My pleasure, JoAnna 🙂 As Cath has mentioned, your guide goes far beyond finding romance. The tips and exercises presented for each step in the process can also help us to develop healthier relationships with others within our circle of family and friends. We’ve got to put in the work.
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I’m so glad you understand. We can do it. One step at a time. 🙂
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Good tips!
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Betul, the praise goes to the author, JoAnne Macco. Thanks for dropping by 🙂
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Thank you for sharing JoAnne’s book!.. it will no doubt help many as they follow their road of life!.. as for this ole born again heathen, I just have one step and that is follow my heart!.. 🙂
Until we meet again, ladies…
May flowers always line your path
and sunshine light your way,
May songbirds serenade your
every step along the way,
May a rainbow run beside you
in a sky that’s always blue,
And may happiness fill your heart
each day your whole life through.
May the sun shine all day long
Everything go right, nothing go wrong
May those you love bring love back to you
And may all the wishes you wish come true
(Irish Saying)
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Dutch, thanks for dropping by and leaving that beautiful Irish blessing 🙂
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Thank you, Ole born again heathen with a beautiful heart and soul and always kind words.
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Sounds like a great book! I wish I had it after my divorce.
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I had a similar thought 🙂 No doubt, since your divorce, you’ve also learned a lot about what works and what doesn’t in your own journey.
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Absolutely!
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I wish I had it after my divorce, too! Experience is such a good teacher. Maybe someone can benefit from ours.
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I hope so 💕
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Roaliene, thank you for this detailed review of ‘From Lonliness to Love’. It is so easy to ‘crash’ from one relationship to another without taking stock of oneself. A book packed with wisdom with teachings that sound relevant to all areas of one’s life.
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Annika, thanks for dropping by and adding your comments 🙂
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Reblogged this on Anything is Possible! and commented:
Thank you to Rosaliene at Three Worlds One Vision for this thoughtful review of my latest book!
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Thanks for sharing, JoAnna! Much appreciated 🙂
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My pleasure! 🙂
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Like you, Rosaliene, JoAnna is always worth reading
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She is, indeed, Derrick. Thanks very much for your kind comment 🙂
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Rosaliene, thank you for your thoughtful review of JoAnna’s loving book. I have read it and it covers so many aspects, especially self-nurturing. Finding our own balance and fulfilling our own needs, saves us from putting too much pressure on a partner. This book goes beyond romantic relationships and I am grateful to JoAnna for sharing her wisdom. ❤
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Jane, thanks for dropping by and adding your comments about JoAnna’s “loving book.” Self-nurturing love does, indeed, shine through her book ❤
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Jasminella, thanks for sharing my review with your readers 🙂
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wow….
that was awesome…
please keep writing..
and please checkout my recent post on loneliness, i will be humbled.
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Thanks for stopping by, Nitya 🙂
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