This is the third in my series of reflections on the “c-o-s-m-o-s remedy” proposed in opposition to the “ideology of e-s-c-a-p-e” by Jem Bendell in Deep Adaptation: Navigating the Realities of Climate Chaos (UK/USA 2021).

#1: Reflections on Compassion
#2: Reflections on Openness

In contrast to the habit of Control in e-s-c-a-p-e ideology, which involves thinking ‘I will try to impose on you and everything, including myself, so I feel safer,’ Bendell proposes that Serenity involves the feeling that ‘I appreciate the dignity of you, myself and all life, however disturbing situations might seem’ (p.146).

Serenity is defined as the state of being calm, peaceful, and untroubled. A look at the day’s headlines suggest that we are more generally inclined to feel the very opposite: fear, dread, anguish, and anxiety. Desperate for control over our lives, we often place our faith in powerful men to save us from drowning. In America, we pass laws to restrict the rights of others for control over their bodies.

Since childhood, fear has been a constant companion. Such is the nature of domestic violence. All I could control was fear itself. In high school, I learned the “Serenity Prayer” asking God for the wisdom to know the difference between things I could and could not change, and the courage to change what was within my power to change. I did what I could to improve communication between my parents, with no observable change.

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